Tuesday, August 30, 2011

What's in a name?

name [neɪm] n 
1. a word or term by which a person or thing is commonly and distinctively known 

I have just been staring at my own name trying to chose one script over another in the creation of my pimped-up signature for this here blog.   And as I was looking at those 5 little letters repeated over and over down my screen I felt oddly distanced from the word.  Not so much the sound of it as the sight of it.  And I realised it not often these days I actually write my name on anything anymore.  I might print it in full with "block capitals in blue or black ink only" when filling out the occasional form but other then that it is rare that I only write my name.  Usually it is nestled between my two Ns (one big, one small) in the company of the Master Q and Little Miss E.   

And more often then not it is another name by which I am more likely to be called these days - "mum".  At times I do feel overwhelmed by it all, as though in the creation of my children I lost a part of myself and perhaps I did - there is a quote I discovered in the days when I had time to scrapbook that stays with me.  

"Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body"
(Oh mighty google has just revealed the source to me - a writer called Elizabeth Stone)

I remember been worried when I was pregnant with Master Q that I would be unable to love him as much as I love Little N simply because I love Little N so entirely but to my utter delight it was as though I had grown a whole new heart which which to love Q and again for Little Miss E.  Yes I may have given up part of who I am by becoming their mother but in becoming their mother they have given me a whole new self.

And for that I will always be grateful. 


Monday, August 29, 2011

And so it begins...

be·gin·ning  (b-gnng)
Noun: The point in time or space at which something starts.
Adjective: New or inexperienced: "a beginning gardener".
This post is the beginning in both the sense of a noun and an adjective. It is the point at which this blog starts and it is writted by a new and inexperienced blogger. So please bear with me while I figure out what works (and what doesn't).
Also at the beginning is the adventure of Or Elsie! So named for our surprise little princess who instantly wrapped her father around her little finger, stole the heart of her two older brothers and got me excited for pink and ruffled dainty impracticality after blue rough and tumble sensibilities.
In the same way I don't know what the future holds for my precious bundle nor do I know what the future hold for her namesake venture. But in the same way I have a vision of a future filled with happiness and love for my children I have a vision filled with dainty fabrics, ruffles and buttons for Or Elsie! Of clothes that make a little girl feel like a princess but still allow her to turn cartwheels and climb trees in comfort. Of cute little bags with a vintage twist for mums and possibly some pretty options for the practicalities of life.